08/06/2009

Had a small bet on the golf last night after posting: Golf: EUR14.29, Tiger is the man!

Well what went wrong today? Pretty much everything. Everything. Was out for most of the day holding hands, first thing I do when I get home is have a bet on the cricket. Didnt even watch it for longer than ten minutes, trading terrible again, much of the same from yesterday. But had €200 Sri Lanka and -€300 Aussies at one stage looking good, Sri Lanka at 1.3 and I get greedy, looking back that hurts, always had in the back of my head if they lose wickets and go to evens I go all red. Which would have been a €50 loss or so - did I do it, well no that was the simple thing to do - I completely switch to the Aussies for some reason (stupidity) and a few minutes later I'm left with a horrible looking all red screen of €200. And that hurts even more.

Cricket: -EUR200.75 Total P&L: -EUR200.75

My trading on the cricket has been terrible lately, finishing -€150 for the whole of last month and this month is nearly -€1,000 on it already! Where do I go from here? Thats simple in my head at the minute, stop betting on it for the week. I'm taking tomorrow off, putting the Betfair bank back down to €100 and going to try play the horses for the main part this week and see what happens. It hurts because I love cricket, I love watching it and I love betting on it.

The long and short of it is that everything comes down to discipline and greed. I was greedy today and that has to stop, I had no discipline either and after talking about it so much thats annoying that I still havent learned anything. But its not my mistakes thats the important thing here, its what I learn from them. Week off from cricket and start again. Another thing thats major - I need my hunger back, I think its gone and I'm just swanning around each day for the last two or three weeks, I'm happy with life and generally have no worries at all, but I have to care more. And gambling has to matter more to me.

I'll be taking Monday off with the other half from now on and wont bet too much on a Monday, will really scale down things from this week. You know the biggest let down is that I've already said most of this to myself and on here weeks ago, I havent learned a thing. But hopefully the starting from scratch will work, the main problem is I'm in shocking form, but this way I wont lose much and if I lose the €100 in Betfair now its not the end of the world, I normally like around €1,000 in the account. The balance for the challenge is still around €12,500 and thats brilliant, I accept losing is part of the game, I just cant stand when I cant do a single thing right and thats been the case for the last two weeks on the cricket, it messes with your head. These things are easily fixed though and once I know whats wrong I can correct it, play myself into a bit of form with a small bank and get my confidence in what I'm doing back. Some people think having a big bank is everything, it is very far from being everything.