Tuesday, May 18, 2010

The End Is Nigh..

Horrible news in Maher towers today with the results of Fantasy Football 09/10 coming in, and believe it or not, Emma has finished in front of me. Yes, beaten by a girl at fantasy Football, head in hands man, I am finnish, she doesnt even watch football FFS, seething. My forfeit is she wants to go to Wimbledon to watch a tennis match on Henman Hill - where she plucked that idea from god only knows, I can wheel a TV out the back garden if she wants like.

A big congratulations to fellow blogger Rob The Builder who finished second with 1,057pts, he laid blame at the tournament officials door as the reason he didnt win, pointing out that they only played seven minutes of stoppage time instead of the normal "until we score" method of stoppage time as seen at Old Trafford. After the final whistle, he refused to talk to The BBC, The Sun, and anyone else whos ever asked an awkward question at a press conference.

The winner was my mate Tomas ending with 1,170pts, when asked what it felt like to win the Kingfisher Carbon Kamal DLF Maximum Citi Moment Of Success Stephen Maher Invitational Gamblers Anonymous Fantasy Football League Trophy he was said to be "overcome with emotion" and that it was "the highlight of his life," stressing that hes never achieved anything else in his life as big as this. Tomas, from Navan in county Meath, was last seen coming out of The George nightclub on Georges Street at 4AM this morning shirtless, wearing just red leather pants. Gardai are appealing to all members of the homosexual community who may have been in contact with Tomas in the past 24 hours to contact them immediately, he is said to be hyper after winning and on a high after visiting the local head shop on South William Street. Rumors of John Terry and Ashley Cole being with him remain unconfirmed.

I must also mention our personal driver, "Schumacher Doyle," a healthy odds on chance to be stopped by the police en route to any racecourse in Ireland these days, finishing in 4th bottom place just avoiding the relegation zone with a score of only 831pts. It was only back a few months ago on the way home from The Curragh he was positioned in joint first and "guaranteed" he was going to win. He shall now be referred to as "Rafa Doyle," when asked about his future Rafa declined to comment but later released a statement on his personal website saying "I greened out in running."

Leading Irish bookmaker Boylesports were quick to react and open a market on next years Kingfisher Carbon Kamal DLF Maximum Citi Moment Of Success Stephen Maher Invitational Gamblers Anonymous Fantasy Football League Trophy..

4/9 Emma Byrne
3/1 Rob The Builder
8/1 Nelson Mandela
12/1 Stephen Maher
16/1 Jose Mourinho
20/1 Gordon Brown
25/1 Tomas Reilly
33/1 Simon Cowell
And 100/1 Rafa Doyle

Leon Blanche from Boylesports commented on At The Races "Weve been absolutely knocked over for the support for the favourite and have laid her to lose just over one million pounds, one fellow came into the shop and asked for €40 each way but we had to knock him back because all the shrewdies got on this morning. We offered him €20 each way at 4/9, the rest at SP, a coffee and a custard cream. You cant eat value."


Back to normality, and a bit of an annoying day for myself punting wise today, three meetings on RUK for in running, the two today went grand and I was up €50 going into the evening meeting tonight, and I've chucked away most of the days profit in a couple of races. Place laid both thirds in the straight, frustratingly so, the first one I laid at odds on was going backwards for the last 2F, just no horse caught up to take third, that type of thing really annoys me you know, I dont know why, most annoying thing on the horses IR for me anyway. But I'm still up €14 so I've decided to quit while I'm ahead, I had dinner in between meetings, maybe I've lost concentration, or just cant read Carlisle coming up the stands rail, either way no harm stopping before I possibly go into the red, if you offered me €20 at the start of the day just off IR I would have taken it you know, nothing else to do on a day like this really, just ticking over. Just a little disappointed to be in a good position and let it slip, I shall spend my €14 on the cinema and be back tomorrow for a bit of real punting on the cricket..

Horse Racing: €14.38 Total P&L: €14.38


  1. why do you say like at the end of a sentence? It sounds awful and reads even worse

  2. Ah sure, I say what comes into my head. I dont wish to become a journalist.. like ;)